It is the Job of a father to be close enough to their child to be able to communicate with them but far enough away that they do not feel overly familiar. Now what I mean by familiar is two fold. The child belongs to you so their will be some type of familiarity. However, the child should not feel like they can talk to you in the same manner that they speak and associate with their friends. It has to be a different relationship their. I personally try to tear down the walls so that my children can feel like they can talk to me about any and everything. It is something I strive for daily but I have to watch that I am not becoming more like their friend. I have to maintain the Father relationship. When I am coming to my children and talking to them about my problems then I have sort of changed the dynamics of the relationship. They have to feel like they can talk to me about anything I don’t believe it should be the other way around.
I know that we love our children and it sometimes seems easier to be their friend than it is to be their parent, but we have to take the high road sometimes. We have to be able to tell them those hard truths even if it is something that may initially hurt their feelings. What hurts them today will make them stronger in days to come. Hebrews tells us in Chapter 12 verses 6-8 “For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.” As fathers the Bible tells us specifically that we have to give our children those hard lessons.
The love that we show our children like they are our friends is very important but there has to be a line drawn. I make sure I spend lots of personal time with each one of my children. So that they know that Daddy loves them and cares about them. We form a bond that becomes unbreakable in those times when we are not able to be together. It’s not a friendship but a fatherhood. A fatherhood that will never go away is the most important one to our children. Even better than a friend when it is done right.
On today think about what you can do as a father to strengthen your relationship with your children.
Yours In Christ,
A Christian Dad