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Christian

Who Are Christian Fathers? 2

We talked about this topic already and touched on the Love that Fathers share. Now we are going to continue the conversation and talk about Christian Fathers in a different light. We are going to talk about how Christian fathers are supposed to be ones who teach.

As Fathers we begin to teach ours children from an early age. We teach them how to say their names, we teach them how to walk, we teach them all kinds of things from the time they are born until the day that we die. We have to get to a point where we are teaching them specific things. Teaching them things from a direct path is very important. It begins to direct them in the way that they should go. Proverbs 22:6 says it best “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Keep teaching them even if you don’t feel like they are learning or understanding you because it will come out that they understand in time. One of my children was telling me what they thought about a situation that was going on in their life. When they were discussing the other person they seemed to understand and display all of the life lessons that I had previously taught them.

It’s even important to teach them the scriptures. If you are able to teach them scriptures at an early age they will definitely have an entire collection of scriptures to use when things get tough in their lives. Scriptures can even be entertaining you can make a game out of learning different facts from the Bible. When my 3 oldest children were little I use to ask them the original names of the 3 Hebrew boys and would give them prizes if they remembered what the names were. We even got into teaching them what the names they had meant and what the new names they were given meant. It allowed them to understand stories from the Bible and things that they meant.

So what’s the point of being a Father that teaches? That’s a very good question. Your children are learning from you no matter if you think they are or not. They are picking up different habits that you have. They are learning ways to speak and communicate even we they are past the point have actually learning how to speak. If the things that we are teaching them are good and wholesome then we will one day have good wholesome adults. So here is a thought: What are we teaching our children? What are they learning?

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

Who Are Christian Fathers?

This is a topic I have battled with off and on. On if I should write about it or not. Should I do things to rock the boat or stay safe when writing about Christian Topics. I decided it was time to loosen up a little and see where it takes me in the realm of Christian Fatherhood. So here we go lets explore who a Christian father is in the eyes of A Christian Dad.

To me a Christian Father is one who loves. That may seem like a given a father is someone who of course will love his children and wife. However, it is not just as simple as loving the people that are directly connected to you but loving all people. We have a lot of things going on in the world around us that people are not seeing Christ in the things that Christians do. For when love is shown by some Christians it is only shown to people who look like them, or act like them, or dress similar ways, or even just the ones who believe what they believe. If they the person they come in contact with doesn’t fall into that category then there are times that love is not shown. This is a bad thing because as a father it is our jobs to show our children how to love. So if your child is seeing you not showing love to someone because they are not the same race as you or because they don’t have the same sexual orientation then we are doing them a disservice. We are teaching them that they don’t have to love unconditionally. We are showing them unintentionally that being prejudice is ok.

When we are dealing with love we have to make sure that the love we show to people is the same love that we receive back. It’s like the old saying goes treat others in the way that you want to be treated. I talked to one of my children and asked them “are you supposed to love everyone?” There response was music to my ears. It was not prompted or anything it was a genuine response to how they felt and believed. They told me “dad we are supposed to love everyone no matter how they look”. Then I asked “no matter how they act?” And she responded “no matter how they act people can be mean and bad sometimes but we still must love them.” She continued to say “I act bad sometimes and you guys still love me so I have to love everyone.” They got it they understood exactly what love is supposed to mean for someone at their age. How we show love to and around our children molds them into great Christians who will change the world with the Power of Love.

This is the beginning of a series on “Who is a Christian Father?” Please read a share with your friends so we can get the conversation started. I love you Guys!

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

How Should Fathers Act During COVID-19?

COVID-19 has come to the World like a force to be reckoned with. It has forced us to look at life in ways that we never thought possible. We spend so much time now trying to make sure that we are safe from a virus we cannot see; that we lose sight sometimes of things that we can see. During this time of COVID-19 I have gotten myself to a point that I can’t focus on the things that I can not control. I have to focus on the things that I can. That brings me to my topic that we will be talking about today.

As fathers in this time of pandemic we must remain strong. We have to be strong for our families and the people around us. We have to allow them to know that we are with them and are there to stand with them through this time of uncertainty. It does not matter what your personal views about what is going on across the world are you have to do what your family feels like is going to keep them the most safe. I went through moments where I did not feel as if wearing a mask was necessary. However, I pay attention to my wife and see that she feels that it is. I see the she wants the children to wear one, so to ensure that I am not causing contradiction within my home I wear a mask. It will not hurt you even if you feel like it is not necessary to put one on. What got to me was my children asking mom “why isn’t daddy wearing a mask?”. She never really had an answer for it but it made the children not want to wear it because dad isn’t. It reminded me of a lesson that Paul was teaching to the Corinthians. He was telling them that even though no meat is unclean and you can eat all of it doesn’t mean you should if it will cause your brother to fall (paraphrasing). Meaning that even if I believe that my mask is not needed and I want to walk around without one doesn’t mean I should put my children at the same risk that I am willing to take.

This though is not all that we have to be aware of. When our children or our spouses are worried about what will happen to them are they going to be able to make it through this pandemic? The best thing that I have found to do is pray with them and for them about it. We can not predict the future but we can encourage them with a life of prayer. God has the ability to comfort us in a way that an ordinary parent can not. If we are showing our children that the power of prayer can be used in any situation of fear then we are teaching them a good lesson. We are teaching them when they are worried about something that they can turn to God in prayer. Fathers now is our time more than ever. Fathers now we have a chance to do something great in the lives of our families. We are able to prepare them for a life filled with the love of Christ Jesus. We can plant seeds that will grow in their hearts for years to come. Take this time during this pandemic to do something extraordinary with your family that they will remember for ever. Be a great dad.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

What Do Fathers Want to Know?

I have been writing this blog for almost a complete month now. I am trying to find out what type of content my readers want to see. I want to know what topics they are wanting to interact with. My goal is to reach fathers who want to be Christian, who are already Christian, who are struggling with their faith. Pretty much any and every father that is out there.

I want this to become a Christian Dad movement and the only way I can make that happen is through communication with my readers. I know this is not like my normal content. I just want to see what you guys thoughts are so far. If you have read an article written by me what do you think so far? What direction do you want to see us go in?

I want to see the growth of God move through this group of believers share with me. Comment please!!

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

Can Fathers Still Be Taught?

Like I have mention previously I have been a father for 11 years. It may not seem long to some but to others it is an eternity. I even had to take the abridged course because when I became one I went from 0 to 4 in a matter of “I Do”. Do I regret the experience absolutely not but it did force me to learn some things very fast. I had to become a father to children who were already graduates of the baby and toddler stage. While also going through the baby and toddler stage. So it goes back to my question can Fathers still be taught?

I personally believe that it is mandatory for us as fathers to learn new things. Even if we are not interested in learning a new skill ourselves sometimes it is necessary. Let’s talk about it a few years after I became a Dad my children got into sports. Some of the sports/events I was not very familiar with but that was not an excuse. My children liked volley ball, tennis and high jump all three I was not very familiar with. So what is a dad to do when he gets in this type of predicament? In our new 21st century digital age YouTube became my best friend. I was able to look up videos on different techniques so that I could work with my children on getting better at what they wanted to do. Since I was willing and able to do that the one who liked volleyball and high jump is doing both of them in College to this day.

That was a simple example about learning a skill so that you can interact with your child. So, what if it is something on a grander scale. What if it is something that you have to learn in order to save your child’s life. There are children that are born with all types of diseases or they develop them over time and it is our duty to learn how to take care of them. It’s our duty not to make excuses on what we can and can not do. I have heard of many fathers packing up and leaving because they no longer know how to take care of their child. They feel like the child is better off with out them in the home. In my opinion that is not a true statement. We have to be prepared to learn new things all of the time in order to make us better fathers.

I like using Eli when it comes to talking about being a father. He was a man that did not learn what to do with his own sons. They grew up and where doing all types of things that they should not have been doing. They were not following the rules that they knew they should especially with their father being the priest. However, God trusted him to get it right with Samuel. God allowed him to prepare Samuel to be the next priest because Eli’s sons were not going to live much longer. Eli had to learn from the mistakes that he had made with his own children and fix them when it came to young Samuel.

Take some time this weekend and learn something new that will benefit you and your children. Once you learn it if it is practical for your children teach it to them as well. We have to be ready to be great Christian Fathers.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

Should The Man Be The Head Of His Household?

I have been inspired to write about this topic because of some conversations that I have had and some that I have seen throughout social media. I have been inspired because through these conversations I have learned a lot about perspectives that people have. Many people may think differently about this topic especially depending on where you grew up. Or even the way that you were raised yourself. So I want to say up front that this is my opinion and some beliefs that I have about the subject. Scripture will back up what I have to say and so will some cultural norms. So here goes lets dive in head first.

My thoughts behind Men being the head of the household is true to me. I feel like it has nothing to do with finances and everything to do with what the man can provide in every way. Meaning larger than the money he may bring to the table. Many times we confuse being the head with who makes more money. In this relationship that is not the case. A man can and should be the head of the household even if the woman is the primary bread winner. I believe this to be true simply from what I find in my Bible. 1 Corinthians 11:3 reads “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.” Meaning that God had mandated that the Man is supposed to be the head. So what does that mean in the 21st Century where we are taught that every one is supposed to be equal? To me it is simple we have to love our wives so much that we are putting their needs above our own. It’s like what Ephesians 5:25 says “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” So here is what I want to say It doesn’t matter if you are broke as a joke and can’t provide financially for your wife and she got it to keep you guys going you should be doing everything else to provide the security for her.

It reminds me of a story I saw on social media. It sets the example of what I was just talking about before. It shows how when you are showing love to a woman so much that you will hold you down because you are holding her down in other ways. This couple was not set up the way that a lot of people may think it should have been the woman was making more money than the man. However like I stated they loved each other dearly. The man was the head of the relationship and the woman loved and wanted to keep him feeling good. They went out with friends and to keep the relationship strong even though he couldn’t pay she slid him her bank card before they even got out of the car. Some may ask why this matters? It matters because men are expected to be able to do certain things in a relationship and this woman understood that so she covered her man.

This is how all of this ties together through scripture and through the culture. Money does not determine who is the head of the relationship the love that you share for each other determines that. With the couple I mentioned they are still together and now he can financially support his wife but she carried him when he couldn’t. If he wasn’t doing the things to cover her during the time when he was not financially there they wouldn’t have the testimony to share today about how they are blessed. Leading your home is the communication that you have. It is the comfort that you give to your children and your spouse. We find that there is nothing like a fathers love. Malachi 4:6 says “And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.” Fathers we have to be willing and ready to lead and be the head or God will be ready and continue to curse our land.

Fathers be the head. Not just for your children but for your wives. It is something they will always remember you for. It is something that will draw your entire family closer to God. Because like we have beat the dead horse its not about finances it is about everything else you can provide. Love, security, well-being, protection, finances all these things make up the head. Be there when it counts.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

How Does Your Children See You Treat Their Mother? Part 2

After writing the first portion of “ How Does Your Children See You Treat Their Mother” I discovered it was something that many people were interested in. Males and Females alike wanted to know what needed to be done in order to set a good example for your children. Many times we as parents aren’t sure what we are doing until it is to late. When we argue or don’t treat our spouses the way that we are supposed to then our children are truly learning habits. They are learning habits that can cause detrimental problems for them in the future.

So lets look at what I feel needs to happen over the course of time to correct the damage that has already been done. Especially for the children that are older and are about to start their own families. This is going to be tough but it is essential. Apologize to your children for the things that you messed up on when they were younger. What does that do some may ask? It allows your children to know that you to are human. That you realize that you have made a mistake and have learned from that mistake. It teaches your children that even though you made the mistake you are willing to teach your children that they don’t have to make the same mistakes. That they can have a more successful marriage than you had initially. The great thing about this is because you are teaching your children how to have a better marriage you will strengthen and grow your marriage as well.

The life that we live in the eyes of our children is important. It teaches them what to expect when they get older. Lots of times it may seem that they are not listening to anything that you have to say but you are making an impact. You are giving them tools that will be able to add to their tool bag for years to come. I love my wife she is my best friend but I have not always treated her that way. I have not always shown her that she is the rock that I stand on. Men we have to set the example. Men we have to show our children that there are a certain ways that their spouses should be treated. Men we are the ones who are to mentor our family. The Bible tells us to be the leader of our households. That we should be the ones that are guiding them through the next levels of life.

I want Fathers to know that believing and trusting in God will allow them to better lead their families. I want fathers to understand that they are born with the power of love and a sound mind. Which means that they have to show the mothers of their children undying love.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

How Do Your Children See You Treat Their Mother?

For me this is a tough topic and something tough to discuss. Like I have mentioned before I married very young and I married someone that was older than I was. I tried to be demanding, I tried to be tough. In the early years I tried to be everything except for what God had called me to be in my marriage. What made it worse is my wife was not the only one who saw these things. Our children saw how we were acting and the things that we were doing to each other. Things not out of love but out of ignorance to what it truly meant to be one with Christ Jesus. I am here to tell you even if you don’t think your children are paying attention to the fighting and arguing its not true. Even if you think in the back of your head somewhere that its none of their business; again, that is also not true.

I had a conversation with one of my children about someone they were dating and lots of things came to light. Things hit home that had never really taken light before. My child told me that “you and mom” argue so what’s the big deal if my partner and I argue all the time. I had to sit there and think to myself about the example that I had already set in my child’s life. It was not a good example and I regret the arguments that my children’s mother and I have had. Yes, we are still married and yes we love each other but we set a bad precedent. So, the next question is how do you move forward when you have already set such a horrible example in the eyes of your children?

There are many different things that you can do to move forward from the place that you are in right now. It doesn’t matter if you already have children or if they are on the way. If you have problems treating the mother of your children badly then you need to work on that relationship. For me divorce is never the answer. I don’t believe that if you loved someone enough to have children with them that you can give up on that relationship. I feel that you have to put just as much work as you put in to mess it up to fix it. By that I mean get counseling, spend more time praying for and with your spouse. For if you can build your spiritual relationship with them then your romantic relationship will be even stronger.

Scripture tells us that we must love our wive’s as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). I have felt like I have known what that has meant for a long time. However, the longer I have been married I find out that the love that I have to have for her has to grow all of the time. Christ shows me more and more ways about how he loved the church. He has shown me that not only did he die for the church he prepared the church for the things that were to come. He set the example for them to follow so that when times get hard the church would be more than prepared.

The way your children see you treat their mother will become learned behavior. For your daughters it will be things that they will expect from their husbands. For your sons it will become the road map that he tries to follow. Even if the children destroy the bad road map that has been placed in front of them their will be leftovers they have to deal with. I watched my father beat on my mother multiple times and even though I have never put my hands on my wife in a malicious way the thoughts cross my mind. It’s something that I have had to push myself to suppress because it was an example that was given to me.

We want our children to see the good things so that they can look back on their childhood and know that Dad loved Mom. That Dad would do anything for Mom. Mom should be the most important woman in your life so make sure your children know it. Make sure there is no doubt that mom is the one for you.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

The Father of Today

Today’s Father is not the same as the father that was accepted in the Middle 1900s. He is not even the same father that was looked at a century ago. We as fathers have to know our role and be able to excell in that role. We as fathers have to be able to embody many of the fathers that are mentioned in the Bible in order to be successful.

We first have to be like Abraham. He was a father that had faith that even at a very old age that God would bless him with a child. He was the father of faith. His faith was so great that after God delivered and gave him the son God wanted him back. Abraham had such great faith that he was going to sacrifice his son right back to God. I don’t know if something that drastic would happen today but we have to have the faith to do what God is asking us to do. We have to have it no matter how big or small the task is. Faith that what ever God ask us to do for or with our children we will be able to do it.

We need to be able to be fathers like what Eli was to Samuel. Eli messed up with his own children and it cost them and him his life. However, he was able to guide Samuel to know who God was. He was able to lead him to the voice of God. He was able to help develop him into one of the greatest Judges to rule the kingdom of Israel. We have to be ready to lead our Children to God. Know matter how old they may be when God comes calling we have to be willing and ready to help our children answer the call.

Lastly, we should become fathers like God. ABBA Father our provider. If we can strive to be closer to God then we will mirror the God in us to our children. When our children see us they will see God. That is something that we have to strive for. Yes all of the Fathers mentioned before this one were good fathers but they were still flawed. They still missed the mark in many other areas. If we strive to be like THE Father then we will be great Fathers.

Yours in Christ,

A Christian Dad

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Christian

Should Fathers Use The Do As I Say Not As Do Saying?

Lots of times parents get caught telling their children do what I say not as I do. Is that really the Christian way to look at life? Will our children really learn from this type of Christian leadership? I feel that as fathers if we live like this our children will do nothing but look down on us in the future.

I can remember times in my life growing up and seeing my family do things as Christians that did not line up with the Bible. For me it put me in a position that I was confused about what I should really be as a Christian. I feel like that was the case because the example that I needed wasn’t there. That makes it hard for Children as a whole. So the huge question then is then what should you do if your life is not where it should be yet you are a parent. You are a father but you are still battling the life you had before you became a Christian. The answer is going to be a tough one but an honest one. You have to do the right thing and teach your children to do the same.

When being a father we have to look at life as though we are the example. We have to be able to have that open communication with them so that when they do mess up they will tell us and not be afraid. I have set my children down and prayed with them and talked to them about mistakes I have made in life and how I don’t want them to make the same ones. I have shared with them that it is no reason for them to struggle with certain things when I have the answers to the test and I can tell them what the end state is going to be. We cannot live our lives with that colloquialism thinking that it will make our children act right because it will not. Think back to when your parents did it to you. Did it correct the thing that you were doing wrong? It probably didn’t so what makes you think it will correct your children.

Let’s talk about it what are some things in life that you are letting your children down with? What are some things that you are doing as a Christian that you should probably stop doing but it still has its grips on you? I know some people wont want to leave things like this in the comments but know if you just type prayer then I believe that we serve a God that is able to reach what ever your need is. He will be able to touch your problem no matter the magnitude. Leave some comments I’m ready to interact.

Yours In Christ,

A Christian Dad