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A Father Is One Who Loves!!!

When you are a Christian you are called to love all people. It doesn’t matter what color they are, what nationality, what ethnic background, what religion, what sexual orientation, what sin they commit, everyone. God has called us to do so and something that hit me hard recently is that people that are not of the same faith do not see that from all of us. It was hard to have a conversation with some friends that believed that Christians don’t love all people; that felt that we pick and choose who we love based off of if they have similar views as we do or if they look like us. It almost bought me to tears that all Christians are not doing what the scripture in Matthew 5:16. That reads “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” It hurts because it is like Christians forget what the entire bible says in Romans 3:23. It reads “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” If that is the case then why is it so easy for society to dismiss love unless it is sexual in nature.

As Christian Fathers in the 21st Century we have to realize that it is our job to love everyone that God has placed in our path. It is not our job to pick and choose who we love but God mandated us to love everyone. This is especially important when it comes to our children. We must show them unconditional love all the time. Just like we discussed in a previous blog that we have to be present as fathers we have to love them and praise them with Love.

Here is were I get a little controversial but it is the truth and the Lord will not bless this ministry if I run from it now but we have to learn to love even when it seems hard to love. What I mean by this is there are lots of people in this world right now who have varying beliefs about sexuality. I 100% believe that marriage is between a man and a woman and that Homosexuality is a sin. However, I also believe that that is not the only sin on the roster. People that are homosexuals are not the only ones that are living in sin but yet it is the only one that we hear churches speaking out about. Not about the people having babies out of wedlock or alcoholics. My point is not to bash any of them but to show that we must show them all the same amount of love. We have to love them until we can’t love them any more.

There are people that God has placed in our lives that are different from us. Yet God placed them there so that we might be able to Love them any way. When we fail to do this we fail to truly do what God has asked us to do as fathers. I am with you it can be very hard sometimes to show love when we ourselves are hurting. It is very hard to show Love when at times we don’t feel like anyone is showing us love in return. This reminds me of the greatest Chapter in the Bible on Love. Paul writes in his first letter to the people of Corinth about Love. He tells them that if he is missing love then even in prophesy he has failed. He tells them that even with all the good things that he may do for people if he doesn’t love them it profits him nothing. We have to change our hard exterior and work on being loving caring fathers. We have to put a little love in our hearts and that love will spread to everyone that we come in contact with.

I want every father, every man that reads this message to take out 20 mins of your day. 20 mins to intentionally show love to people that you come in contact with. Show them that fathers are able to show love just as much as mothers are. Fathers showing love will make this world a more positive place.

Yours in Christ,

A Christian Dad

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How To Be Present as A Christian Father

Throughout the years of being a father as I mentioned in early post I had to learn on the fly. I did not always want to do things with the kids or be bothered by them but thanks be to God that he convicted me of that very early in my time of being a father. That is why I am writing this today. Many times fathers lack the ability to be present in the lives of their children. They are physically there but they are still missing in action. I ask some of my coworkers and friends what grade their child is in or what their teachers name is and they have no clue. They are present but very absent at the same time. If you don’t know what grade your child is in and you live in the same house then you are absent. I am going to give a quick list of ways that you can be present with your children and it wont take much time out of your already stressful life because it is things that you are already doing just not with the right mindset.

Pray With Your Children

This is something that has to be mentioned in the very beginning we are Christians none the less. If you take a few minutes to pray with your children daily then you are setting the stage for being present in their lives. Prayer gives us the ability to see into the lives of our children without having to be around them at all moments. My wife and I pray for and with our children daily and because of this there are times when our children are out doing things and we tell them what they are doing over the phone when we are talking with them. God gives us the ability to be present with them even when we are absent. If we are praying with our children this verse will hold steady Ephesians 6:4 reads “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” MEV. If we are praying with our children then we are present with them and we are giving them instruction that they can carry with them the rest of their days.

Play With Your Children

A lot of times the moments that are children remember about us as fathers are the times that we have done fun things with them. Their first time doing what ever it is that they thought was so amazing will stick with them forever and sometimes with you to. It can be simple things like playing catch with your children or even playing dress up and having tea parties. It is not about what you play it is that you play. You will notice smiles on their faces, you will hear them talk about it with their friends. The times we play with them will be written down in the memory bank of everyone of your children. It will give them memories that they will be able to look back on and be like My dad did that with me. This is a loose interpretation of this scripture but relevant for what we are talking about Zechariah 8:5 reads “And the streets of the city shall be full of boys and girls playing in the streets thereof.” KJV. If we are playing with our children we are present and giving them memories to always look back on.

Praise Your Children

This praise could have a twofold meaning I could have said praise with your children and been really churchy but it would have fit the mold on how to be present. However, this form of praise will help you better than the praise with. Give your children praise. There are going to be times in life when your children are not going to be having a good day and some encouraging words from dad will get them over the bridge. This hit home for me because this step to being present is were at times I lack. I have spent some extensive time in the military and we are not always keen on giving a lot of praise even when it is merited. It also hits home because I have a child that at times doesn’t feel like she is appreciated. She feels like sometimes she doesn’t do anything right. So this proves to me that even with my children I have to take time to show and give them praise. If I can praise strangers for doing good things then why can’t I praise my own children when they do things that are good. Knowing this we can’t get stuck in the mindset that we must only praise our children when they are doing things that are good. We must praise them just for being our children. David wrote in Psalms 139:14 “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works: and that my soul knoweth right well.” KJV. David was speaking about praising God for these reasons but look at all the things that we are able to praise our children for. We can praise them just because they are fearfully and wonderfully made.

The purpose of being present in the lives of our children is important not just for the wellbeing of the child but the well being of you as the father. You need them as much as they need you that is why God blessed you with them. Take out some time to be present with your children today.

Yours in Christ,

A Christian Dad

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How to Be a Good Father with Prayer

I have been a father for the Past 12 years of my life. When I became one it was sort of an out of nowhere unexpected experience. I was 20 years old and dating an older woman. When we married I went from being a father of zero to a father of four instantly so I had to learn on the fly. I can admit that many things I did when I first became a father where with a good heart and intention but not what God would have wanted me to do. Times where hard because I was not completely ready for this new role and I had to prepare to undo some of the things that had already been done to the children. Nothing was ever done to them maliciously but just things from the life they lived without a two parent home. Anyway I have digressed from the purpose prayer is what has maintained the relationships that we have and having an open ear to them and to God.

Scripture teaches us in Proverbs 22:6 “to train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it”. This simply means to me that if you spend time teaching your children who God is and what it is about then even when they have problems in their lives they will eventually turn back to God. Struggles that they may go through may seem like they are tough at the time but they will in the end prevail. God has also taught us in scripture that “men ought always to pray, and not to faint”. This verse written by the Gospel writer Luke in Chapter 18 verse 1 tells us that when we are fathers and men we should always be praying not just for our children but everything in our family.

The things that we do are noticed even when we don’t realize they are watching us. Our children see when we pray or read our bibles. They see when we make time for them or shoo them away. They are paying attention to us so we must make it our mission to pay attention to God. Before I go I want to tell you two stories one of me personally and one that one of my friends recently posted on Facebook. When my oldest daughter was a freshman or sophomore in high school she was having a conversation with one of her friends and her comment touched me so that I still remember today and try to live by her thoughts. She stated that I had told her something and I never lie so it had to be true. So know I strive daily to seek God and pray to him so that her thoughts of me being so good that I never tell a lie can remain true. Prayer keeps us honest even with our children. The other story pertains to my friend and his children. They were driving down the road and saw a homeless man standing on the corner. One of the children saw the man and noticed that their dad had $13 dollars sitting in the center console. The child had alway seen Dad doing the right thing so they commented for their dad to let the window down. The next part is what touched my heart and spirit the dad objected and said the guy might not be homeless and the child replied that we are blessed and if he willing to stand out side in the hot sun then we can bless him to. Our words and things that we teach our children stick with them. Our prayers allow what we teach them to stick. Let your prayers stick!!

Yours in Christ,

Christian Dad

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Who am I as a Christian Father?

My purpose for beginning this blog is because I do not see a lot of content on line written by Christians like me. I see a lot of stuff about the super Churchy Christian. This Christian is the type that I sort of grew up around and never really fit in with. Nonetheless I am a Christian a believer of God who wants to follow Christ and help other fathers do the same thing.

I have a background in ministry I have been a minister for the last 14 years of my life. I grew up in the church and what I have really noticed is the lack of Fathers in the Church. That is something that I desire to change. Granted being a Christian in today’s society is not always deemed cool or the thing to do but being a father to your children or the children around you is a huge part of the commission that God has giving us.

My thought about life and ministry is that we should do it the way that Jesus did it. One of my favorite verses in the Bible comes from John 1:14 it reads “And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, and we beheld his glory, the glory of the only begotten of the father full of grace and truth. This verse is simple in explanation to me. It means that Jesus became man and dwelt among the people of God. Once they dwelt together they received his glory. The only way that we as fathers can truly show our families who God is is by dwelling with them, spending time with them. Being intentional about that relationship. Not only because you want your family to believe but because you desire for your family to love you.

I am looking forward to getting to know everyone that begins to read this blog. Leave me some Comments and ask me some questions and I will be sure to answer them with scripture and love.

Yours in Christ,

The Christian Dad